The Quarter-Life Crisis Edition

Figuring It Out, One Existential Meltdown at a Time

Hi Lazies,

They told us our twenties would be the best years of our lives — full of adventure, ambition, and self-discovery. What they forgot to mention was the existential dread, the unexpected plot twists, and the moments of looking back at our younger selves, wondering: Was I cooler back then?

In this issue, we navigate the messy, funny, and deeply personal realities of the quarter-life crisis. Women reflect on their mother-daughter relationships, question everything they thought they knew, and find humour in the chaos of growing up. Because if we can’t make irony of our own crises, what’s the point?

This issue features illustrations from Isabelle Toutounji and Harshita Naidu

Your Lazies

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This month, we asked our members to reflect on a topic that is so relevant to many: the quarter-life crisis. We reflected on the transition to womanhood, the ‘important’ decisions we’ve made (or didn’t), anxiety, and changing values. Below, you’ll find three very different pieces that we hope will resonate with you. If they do, don’t hesitate to let us know in the comments!

Lazy Harshita:

You’re somewhere around 27-ish. The person you used to be? A walking disaster with a thirst for adventure — always up for something reckless, always dreaming about the day you’d have the time, money, and freedom to do every single idiotic, adrenaline-fuelled thing your chaotic little heart desired.

And now? Now, you do have the money and the freedom… and somehow, your idea of living it up is rotting on your couch, rewatching the same comfort series for the hundredth time, because the mere thought of going out feels as exhausting as running a marathon in wet jeans. But, plot twist: while you’re at peak relaxation, there’s a tiny, nagging voice in the back of your head whispering, "You’re wasting your youth. Get up, you lazy fossil."

To make things even messier, you’re at an age where you’re finally getting your shit together—wearing the Responsibility Cape™ because, like it or not, people are actually relying on you now. This is the era of being the adult in the room, of making sure things don’t fall apart. So here you are, stuck in an existential tug-of-war—one side being your inner child, screaming for adventure, and the other, Mr./Ms. Responsible, trying to keep life (and your credit score) intact.

And the worst part? You have to pick a side… and neither feels fully right

Well, my friend, welcome to the exclusive club of the quarter-life crisis. You’ve probably heard of a midlife crisis — you know, the classic "buy a sports car and question your entire existence" phase. Well, this is the crash course on how to survive that when you get there. Consider it the prequel, the warm-up act, the beta test for your eventual full-blown existential meltdown.

Illustration by Isabelle Toutounji

And no, I’m not about to give you the “101 Ways to Overcome Your Quarter-Life Crisis” guide, because let’s be real—everyone’s got their own way of dealing with it. We’re all just starring in our own personal drama, juggling different crises like unpaid interns in the corporate world. Some are battling their villains (hi, toxic bosses and bad Tinder dates), some are chasing the so-called love of their life, and some are just trying to survive one more mind-numbingly pointless meeting with their manager without throwing themselves out the nearest window.

But hey, if you’re still wondering what exactly a quarter-life crisis is and why it feels like your brain is going through a Windows update it didn’t sign up for, let me break it down.

Turns out, there are some classic stressors that push us into this delightful spiral, like:

• Job searching or trying to figure out what the hell you actually want to do with your career.

• Living alone for the first time and realizing that groceries don’t magically appear in the fridge.

• Navigating relationships—romantic or otherwise—while also trying to keep yourself emotionally stable.

• Making long-term personal or professional decisions, even though you can barely decide what to order for dinner.

So yeah, welcome to the Club of Uncertainty™. The drinks are overpriced, the existential dread is complimentary, and none of us actually know what we’re doing. Cheers. 🥂

Lazy Lauren:

A shift I noticed through my 20s, and that certainly contributed to quarter-life crisis anxieties, is what it means and how it feels to no longer be the youngest in the room at work. Expectations shift, and what is considered impressive delivery or output at 21 is different to at 28. There's a sense that having a certain level of competency as a bright young thing is surprising to people a few decades, or even a few years, older. But as 'young' becomes less of an obvious descriptor, being good at what you do in the workplace, even really good, becomes less of a surprise and more of an expected standard. Newbies come along with fresh ideas and a different sort of enthusiasm, that renders the late 20s/early 30s crew part of the furniture. We might still burn bright, but that flame lights the room in a different way.

Illustration by Isabelle Toutounji

Lazy Maria:

In Caribbean family altars, some people not only pay homage to the dead, but also to the living. Exploring the topic of family ties, we have that very fundamental mother-daughter dynamic. These altars are not the exception. Combining honey/sugar and photographs, healing of the wounds through the immersive and combined display of these objects, transforms the emotional wreckage in a psychosomatic - and perhaps- ‘transferrable’ intention that goes beyond the esoteric meaning. It’s a time travel proposal in a way. Looking at an old picture, dreaming of what could’ve been or what could still be. 

Reflecting on the work “Miel para las heridas” - created by Erika Morillo and Letra Muerta Inc. in their recent art collaboration in New York - ignited my everyday thoughts on my mother and her dreams. As I grew up into a young woman prioritising her independence, the thought of what that one before me has given up, unceasingly knocks at my door. 

"Miel para las heridas" by Erika Morillo

Sometimes, I wish I was her friend when she was a teenager. I wish I could have helped her navigate her own fears and storms. Maybe I would have told her that at 19 she could have still studied tourism—her long life dream that she couldn’t fulfill — instead of getting married and becoming my mother. Or perhaps I could’ve just made her feel less alone. She could’ve travelled, learned a new language, and sat on her own with an ice cream to see the sunset. 

Nonetheless, I know she did the best she could. I don’t judge her nor do I intend to have a saviour complex (I say while maybe I lowkey - and a bit pathetically - have it). I know she thought that what she was living were the privileges of womanhood, but they were actually the opposite. She thought she couldn’t choose. She had to run from one not ideal situation to another one. She was oppressed, and I didn’t understand this when I was a teenager. I just thought she was the one completely missing my point and my feelings, in her immaculate and only mother figure. But she was - and is - much more than that. This particular perspective made us fluctuate, not only then, but throughout the years. Today, as a girl who grew up with more advantages and information than her, I understand her better, and I have my For Melancholy Brunettes (and Sad Women) moment while thinking about my beautiful mother, her brown eyes, and her outlook while passing from her girlhood to womanhood: “little girl meant no harm”.

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Last, but not least — The Lazy Women Podcast has just the right episode on the topic, The Terrible Twenties: Learning How to Navigate Our Quarter Life Crisis. Go listen to this beautiful episode with Una & Zsofi!

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New Article!
Something that remains a hot topic in one’s twenties is the 'relationship question.' There’s pressure to be with someone, pressure to get married 'before it’s too late,' and doubts about whether you’ll ever find the right person. In our new article ‘Happily Ever After, Solo’, Lazy Julie reflects on her life as a by-choice single woman.

A Quarter-Life Reflection: What Was I Thinking? (by Julie)

I used to joke that when I turned 25, my frontal lobe finally finished developing, and I’ve been nothing but wise and intelligent ever since. Strangely enough, it feels true — and my 25+ friends agree with me.

To honour this peak of cognitive development (which will certainly prevent me from doing anything reckless or bizarre in the future, of course), I’ve compiled a list of things I did before 25 that still make me wonder what I was thinking:

1. Learned Ancient Greek for fun in online group classes. The classes took place at 9 pm…

2. Quit my only job 2 months after moving to a big city. (Never regretted it, though)

3. Participated in a national French translation competition and placed —despite not knowing French at the time. Who would’ve thought...

   

4. Bleached my hair at home because I was so confident in my skills. No, Julie from the past, it was not worth losing half your hair.

5. Inevitably dated a much older man…

6. Got my nose pierced in someone’s apartment — for a bet. It looked safe, okay?

7. Went to ballet barre training at 6:45 a.m. (I’m still a Moscow girl through and through, but I can hardly imagine doing this in Paris.)

8. Had such an intense Queen’s Gambit phase that I went on to co-coordinate a feminist chess club.

9. Got really into mantra meditation and Krishnaism — for more than two years.

10. Didn’t mind hitchhiking — and once found myself stranded on a February night (-40°C) in the middle of nowhere in Russia with a car that wouldn’t start. I still wonder how I didn’t end up in plastic bags in the forest nearby.

Whenever I share these random bits of my past, I struggle to explain what I was thinking or how I ended up in these situations. No judgment, though — my frontal lobe wasn’t at its prime yet.

Any similar experiences you’ve had?

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1. To begin with, we’re sharing an important message from our friends at Lieu d’Accueil et d’Orientation Pow’Her (LAO), a French shelter for women who are victims of violence. Since 2019, Pow’Her has helped more than 700 young women. As is often the case, the centre’s existence and operations, unfortunately depend on crowdfunding and public support. On March 8, 2025, a new campaign ‘Je soutiens le LAO’ (I support the LAO) was launched, with a goal of raising €50,000. You can discover centre’s work on their website and also watch a documentary called ‘Hors Radar’ (France TV), which offers an insight into their support for young women.
   

2. On March 19th, Lazy Women, represented by María Cuéllar, participated in the Global Focus event by Reset! Network in Brussels, Belgium. The one-day workshop brought together diverse organisations to discuss digital rights, civic spaces, democracy, and global human rights. Following the workshop, a live podcast and expert panel at Reset! Atelier explored the state of digital media and free expression in Europe and beyond, aiming to identify common values and potential actions for concrete solutions.

3. Last week in Paris, our founder, Zsofi, spoke on a CMX-organized panel about the importance of creating creative spaces for women and encouraging them to pursue their dreams. She was joined by Astrid Louise, Shannon V., (and fellow Lazies Julie and Eve!) for the discussion.

   

   Panel discussion by CMX in Paris

4. We’d also like to thank all our lovely leaders for being such loyal readers—the newsletter’s January edition received over 1,000 views, and the Lazy Women newsletter gained more than 1,000 subscribers. We hope to keep putting out what inspires you and us!

   
   Don’t forget to subscribe to our new newsletter column — Dear Lazies, brought to you by LW editor-in-chief Zsofi Borsi, for inner reflection, advice, and drama. Click below to subscribe!

5. And on the last note — it’s that time of the year again! Our Lazy Women annual memberships are officially open. If you want to support our platform, become part of our growing community, and help our community flourish, consider renewing your annual membership.

P.S. Our newsletter team is fully volunteer-based. We work on every issue throughout the whole month — picking a topic, collecting submissions and illustrations, writing, and editing.

If you like what we do, you can support our work via a paid subscription option on Substack 👇